Until a while ago, there was length of time, a period of time where I did not go to confession. There was no one else to blame but myself, of course, the Devil did have his part to play in this. I was afraid...as if my confessor would tell everyone my sins, and that he'd think badly about me whenever he saw me.
Of course these were foolish, and the instant I stepped into the confessional and knew that Christ died for my sins and was now ready to forgive me, as he did so many times before. I was contrite and truly sorry....not out of fear of Hell, but for love of God and knowing that I had offended Him and fallen out of friendship with Him. With the glorious help of Our Lady, the Mother of God and our Mother, I was and am now rid of those fears.
But, my soul was blackened out with the miserable soot of mortal sin. I was spiritually barren. Of course I said my prayers, a lot of prayers, and my Rosary dutifully....but again I was foolish. My soul was still not in a state of grace. It was a dark period spiritually, and I'm glad to be out of it once again.
God has unending and endless mercy. However, that does not in any way give us permission to go out and sin on purpose "because I can go to Confession later...". That only proves we don't have a full love of God, with our very heart and soul. It only shows that we are ignorant of Our Lady's most Immaculate Heart, and her glorious and loving motherhood towards us.
God is not far from us, all we need to say is "Father" and His very ear is at our lips.
When we choose to disobey the Church, the only true Church, and instead choose to abide at our own will...we choose our own self desire instead of the commandments given to us from Our Lord.
Our Blessed Lord is truly knocking at our door. Why am I so foolish as to not open it?
He left us the Church, and His Vicar to guide us on Earth.
God's mercy and forgiveness is endless and can not be described in words. Our Lord said to St Faustyna...
Tell souls not to place within their own hearts obstacles to My mercy, which so greatly wants to act within them. My mercy works in all those hearts which open their doors to it. Both the sinner and the righteous person have need of My mercy. Conversion, as well as perseverance, is a grace of My mercy.
And then? Our Lord gives us His own Mother, Mary Immaculate. She is our mother, whenever we're in doubt or pain, whenever we are joyous and whenever we are ecstatic we go to Our Blessed Mother.
St Ambrose tells us
What is the purpose of what I have written? That there is only one truth, one God, and his mercy is endless. That he has not abandoned us nor shall He ever. He is just and merciful. Rewarding the good and punishing the bad, he is our Father. We are his creation and should avoid every instance that offends Him. We can obtain everything through Our Lady, the Mother of God who wept with the sigh of Her son crucified, and who intercedes for us before His throne. We have the Saints to endlessly pray for us, who we can go to in our time. And we, must strive to be saints.Let, then, the life of Mary be as it were virginity itself, set forth in a likeness, from which, as from a mirror, the appearance of chastity and the form of virtue is reflected. From this you may take your pattern of life, showing, as an example, the clear rules of virtue: what you have to correct, to effect, and to hold fast. The first thing which kindles ardour in learning is the greatness of the teacher. What is greater than the Mother of God?